RSS

Monthly Archives: May 2012

Quit Raping Me

Quit Raping Me
by Dawn Pringle

Quit raping me

Quit raping me

cries the five year old to her father

Quit raping me

Quit raping me

screams the teenager to her boyfriend

Quit raping me

Quit raping me

begs the wife to her husband

Quit raping me

Quit raping me

shouts the child within to her older self.

Copyright © 2009

Advertisements
 
Leave a comment

Posted by on May 24, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

Suicide of a Butterfly

Suicide of a Butterfly
by Dawn Pringle

The claustrophobic abode became too much.

The entity inside spread its wings to escape.

It’s not the beauty on the outside that counts, however.

Tis the ugliness on the inside that directs the way this faux, beautiful creature heads.

Quit fussing over the outer beauty that holds mysteries in its creation that you will never understand.

It has become too much, and this beautiful butterfly clips its wing on the razor’s sharp edge.

She knew it was there.

She can now release the blackness which others never want to witness.

Freedom.

Copyright © 2009

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on May 24, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

Quit Ignoring the Children

Quit Ignoring the Children

Quit ignoring their pain

Start believing their words

Stop believing they're insane


Out of the mouths of babes

Rarely come the lies

If you cant hear it in their voices

Then see it in their eyes

 

Quit ignoring the children

Quit ignoring their pain

Let us stop their crying

Let us break the chain

Copyright © 2009

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on May 24, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

Wounds

As of today, I am having such a hard time with the deepest of wounds.  Wounds that nobody else can see, but I feel as though they are visible and splitting my flesh wide open.  They are painful.  Nobody sees them which makes them that much more difficult to deal with.  I pray to God and cry until it hurts, yet I toss and turn with slow motion movies vividly replaying in my head.  At the bottom of the page in a journal, it reads, “The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.”  However, I want to not see the movies I was the “star” in.  I need God to heal these wounds that nobody else sees.  I want him to.

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on May 22, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , ,

Wanna Know Something?

“Wanna know something?”  That’s how a text “conversation” began on May 16th, 5:43pm and ended at 6:20pm.  I will only include my words only because I don’t know if my friend wants her words on here.  However, here is what I typed:

“God is for us, and he is so very good.  He wants an intimate relationship with us and wants us to have one with him.  He has a plan for us that’s already working.  He never leaves us.  His love is unconditional.  We killed Jesus Christ, and he prayed that we be forgiven.  If we have to forgive someone who wounded us everyday, then we need to, so that we are forgiven accordingly.  We have no right to ask for forgiveness if we hang on to “unforgiveness”.  Seven times seventy he said.  He loves you and me the exact same way he loves those who have damaged us.  We are all his creation.  Jesus had to die so that we could live.  We have to go through him to get our inheritance.  Our inheritance is eternal life with God almighty.  If we want it.

There is no price of admission.  That’s been taken care of on the cross.  God had his only son pay our way with every drop of his holy blood.  With his tears.  His agony.  His obedience.  Our chains have been broken.  We have done nothing to deserve that….we never can.  It was just given.  Just given because we are children of the one and only God.  How do we have the right to ask anything from someone who has died for us?  We do ask, though, don’t we?  And he answers faithfully.  All the time he is faithful!  All the time he is loving!  All the time he is gracious and forgiving!

Father,  thank you for loving us sinners so much that you gave your son’s life so that we would know you.  Thank you for giving us chance after chance to know and love you.  You have a place for us with you.  Thank you Father.  In your son’s holy and precious name,  Amen.”

I just felt like I should share this.  I love God so very much.  He so loves me.  He so loves you, too.  I don’t like going back to read what I’ve typed or texted or written.  It makes me anxious and uncomfortable.  I felt those things doing this post.  I was told that I was hit with the Holy Spirit when I stated I didn’t know what had just happened in that text.  Like I said, I felt like I was supposed to share this even though, right now, I’m so very anxious and uncomfortable about it.  I feel quite vulnerable right now.   Satan does not get to win this battle, though.  I believe he did not want me speaking good of my Heavenly Father.  Satan wants me to delete this right here and now.  God is on my side, so I am not so completely worried about what Satan will hit me with next.

What, then, shall we say in response to these things?   If God is for us,   who can be against us?  Romans 8:31

I am not a complete fool about how Satan can come at me.  Any crack in the armor, and he can sneak in.  I have God, though.  That’s all I need.  I feel very teary right now about how much God is loving me and protecting me.  I have a tendency to feel insecure about my words regarding God….my prayers……this has been mentioned in previous posts.  As I was reading a Beth Moore book recently, she mentioned this verse:

She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.  Proverbs 31:25

It hit me right in the core of my being.  I want to be clothed in strength and dignity.  I am tired of my insecurity where God and praising him is concerned.  God, clothe me with strength and dignity….I beg this of you at this very moment!  Thank you, Father.  Thank you.

I would like to know what any of you honestly feel about this post.  It is not a fishing expedition, however.  It is my need to know where you are where any of this is concerned.  It is my attempt to have you continue speaking of God, so that Satan does NOT get to win.  I want you to be clothed with strength and dignity as well.

Thank you for taking the time to read.  God bless you.

 
6 Comments

Posted by on May 18, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , ,

Friendship

Man, that word is twisted, crumpled, and thrown around in today’s world.  I have seen it in my kids’ lives.  They have friends when those friends are getting what they want/need out of the situation.  For example, if this other person’s friend is not speaking to them at the moment, they run to someone who will talk to them and ignore the problems sitting before them.  After a certain amount of time, they leave the one who took the time to listen and let them cry on their shoulders and run back to the one who treated them poorly to begin with.  I am talking about teenage girls here.  Those of you with teenage girls know exactly what I am talking about.

What I want to discuss here, though ,is adult friendships.  Being responsible for your own fecal matter (I would have like to have inserted a bowling word, but minors may read this) for those you are in relationships with.  I have had friends who want me around when I am the “Yes (Wo)Man”.  When there are no more answers of yes left, they head off to find someone else to be that person.  I am 43 years old, and I want real people in my life.  I do not have time for pretend.  I have one of the most amazing women in my life right now, and because I listen to my own fears from experiences, I hurt her.  What in the name of all that is good and right is OK about that?  I fail many times with this friendship.  I see it as the relationship I have with God.  Not that my friend of flesh is God, but you know.

My relationship of God is one of trust and love and respect and just having faith.  Sometimes, I believe I know better and lean on my own understanding.  I fail God at that moment.  I fail God when I stop trusting and respecting and having that faith.  The thing is, it is not anything God has done to make that happen.  It is all on me and my experiences.  It does not make it okay, however.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;  Proverbs 3:5

 When I sin against God I beg for forgiveness.  When I fail against my best friend, I beg for forgiveness.  I admit my faults in both situations, and I lay all my ugliness right on out there on the table.  It is so dark and ugly, my stuff.  You cannot have an honest relationship with God or any person unless you are willing to look at your sludge, your “pornographic” issues.  I use the word pornographic because it is disgusting.

I have given my word, my promise, that I will never let my insecurity be an issue with my best friend again.  My word is good.  God’s word is better, and He  knows your faults, and if your friend is real, so does she.  Most likely, they love you anyway.  I am blessed my God and my best friend loves me anyway.

“Nothing will work unless you do.”
That quote is from Maya Angelou.  I very much plan on working on everything and everyone that matters.
 
Leave a comment

Posted by on May 4, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , ,

Mountains

Image

Look at that.  Just beautiful is it not?   Admire the shades of greens and browns and the multitude of other colors.  That is God’s glorious mountain.  That is HIS work.  I would love to sit in that area and view that for the rest of my life.  The Lord created all that we see for us.  Creation begins in the first verse, in the first chapter, of God’s word.   Mountains are huge, and I have never even tried to climb one.  I do not even have the nerve.  I see it and think, “Oh no way that is too huge.  There is no way I can make it halfway up that thing!”

The mountain will tell you
 That you can’t make it over;
 It will try to convince you
That it’s way too high;
 Though you feel defeated,
Know that God keeps His promise;
So you tell the mountain
 Just how big your God is

I have been fighting my own mountain recently.  It is big, scary, and all I can hear are the lies because I lost the earplugs that I asked for  Here.  My mountains are not beautiful.  They do not have beautiful arrays of colors and beautiful sounds of streams in the distance.  They are not built from God’s hands with soil, rocks, moss, and grass.  My mountains are built of things like:

We get dirty and cut up with scrapes and dirt-filled eyes and ears,  and we scream to God, “OK, I GIVE UP!”  God says, good….it is about time.  I am, of course, paraphrasing.  However, look at this:

“[A]t my presence…. The mountains will be overturned, the cliffs will crumble and every wall will fall to the ground.”
Ezekiel 38:20

So why should we not ask for God to step in?  It is hard, sometimes, to remember that His presence will move our mountains.  We are too busy getting skinned knees and elbows, getting dirty, sore, and hurt, and wishing we had the easiest way to get over that mountain.  There is an easy way.  All we have to do is cry out for God’s help.

“But I have had God’s help to this very day, and so I stand here and testify to small and great alike.”  Acts 26:22

I had a huge mountain in my way recently, as previously stated.  Everyone I can count on was sleeping, except for one person reminding me of my grandchild I will be having near Christmas.  My mountain involved breaking a promise to someone I love very much, and I do NOT break my promises.  I needed to not wake her.  She would have sent me toward God anyway, so I took the shortcut, so to speak.   Some of them I couldn’t wake up even if I lit firecrackers in their nostrils.  I turned to a sermon I missed from a church I go to.  I soaked in the tub, put the sermon on my phone, and he was talking about mountains.  How to make them move.  How to get them out of the way.  Let God do His job!!  He is just waiting for you/me to get out of the way.

Dear God, I give up. I need your help.  I’ll step aside now and let you do what you do.  Thanks for that.  I love you.  Amen.
 
2 Comments

Posted by on May 4, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: ,

 
%d bloggers like this: