Monthly Archives: July 2012


The game of chess is so beyond me, so I do not even try to play it.  It takes strategical focus that I just do not have.  The objective is to place the king in checkmate.  You on one side, your opponent on the other staring intensely as the other attacks and counterattacks.  You set the pieces on the board in their “assigned” places.  You take your hand and you move your piece in a spot where the best outcome is for you.  Each piece, no matter size or ability to move, is important and powerful.  This is how I see life.  The Earth is the chess board.  The people are the game pieces.  God is the player moving each piece where He can acquire victory.

The game pieces in chess are unable to question why the player has moved it in a particular space.  Although we are able to question God when he places us in a particular space, why would we do so?  I am far from innocent when it comes to not questioning God.  It is part of our humanness to do so.  We, as humans, always need to know “why?”.  Not asking that “why” question is to be trusting in God’s love and knowledge of us.  He knows our abilities before we do.  He put us together just the way He wanted in our mothers’ wombs.

You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Psalm 139:13

Since God put us together in the wombs of our mothers, does it not seem logical that He knows how we work, think, feel, and operate?  He places us in spaces that we are uncomfortable with sometimes.  Those places seem risky and unknown.  He puts us there for His reasons.  Trusting Him is all we can do when we feel unsure, unknowing, and fearful.  God moves us with His own hands in the places he knows we will prosper.  It is up to us to fulfill that duty.  God will keep all of His promises as has been done since “In the beginning”.  God’s opponent on a daily basis is Satan.  Satan wants us to move in rebellious, impure, unloving ways.  Satan places us in dangerous positions on the game board and tempts us to make reckless decisions.  God makes His move against Satan at the right time.

“At just the right time, I heard you.  On the day of salvation, I helped you.”[ Indeed, the “right time” is now. Today is the day of salvation.  2 Corinthians 6

God  knows the “game”.  God understands how each of us can move and in what direction.  God places us right where he wants us at the exact right time. Have faith in God and in where He places you.   The goal of God?  His goal is to be able to blatantly proclaim “CHECKMATE!” against Satan.  Bobby Fischer has nothing on God.

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Posted by on July 28, 2012 in Uncategorized


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This is really good! I had to reblog it.


So, you still believe in a merciful God?”  Some of the comments online are genuinely inquisitive, others are contemptuous in nature. Regardless of the motive behind the question, I will respond the same way.


Yes, I do indeed.

Absolutely, positively, unequivocally.

Let’s get something straight: the theater shooting was an evil, horrendous act done by a man controlled by evil.  God did not take a gun and pull the trigger in a crowded theater. He didn’t even suggest it. A man did.

In His sovereignty, God made man in His image with the ability to choose good and evil.

Unfortunately, sometimes man chooses evil.

I was there in theater 9 at midnight, straining to make out the words and trying to figure out the story line as The Dark NightRises began. I’m not a big movie-goer. The HH and I prefer to watch movies in the comfort…

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Posted by on July 21, 2012 in Uncategorized


Biggest Bully

Conversation at hospital yesterday:

“Is your name Dawn?”

“Yes, it is.”

“Did you go to Palo Duro?”

“Yes, I did.”

“OMG, you were my biggest bully!”

Ok, so that stopped me in my tracks and hit a place so far deep into my core.  I became numb from the shock, and wrestled with those words for a couple of hours.  I still am wrestling to a degree.  I never in a million years thought someone would think that I was a bully to them.  Now, I say that knowing full well how I was in high school.  I do not deny that I was very angry, and anyone who looked at me in that tone of voice was probably going to catch it from me one way or another.  I never hit anyone.  I talked the talk.  If I would have had to, I would have walked the walk.  I never had to.  Here’s this woman, though, all these years after high school, and that is how she remembered me.  As another group was to start in the afternoon, I struggled with how I was going to handle this situation.  So, here’s what I did.  I stood up in front of the eleven people, and I said (pointing to this individual), “I have known her for a long time.  I was not nice to her in high school, and today she let me know that I was her biggest bully.  That hit me in a way I was not prepared for.  So, in saying all of that, I would like to say this, ‘Will you forgive me?'”  She looked me in the eye, and she said, “Yes, I absolutely forgive you.”  After that, another individual asked for forgiveness from others.  The whole point of this blog is just to let you know that people do not forget how you treat them.  One day, you may find out that you were someone’s biggest bully.  One day, you may need to ask for forgiveness from someone you have treated poorly.  Yesterday, I was humbled, and I was also set free by her forgiveness.


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Posted by on July 17, 2012 in Uncategorized


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Feeling Scattered

Ever had to pick up and move somewhere new?  Ever been placed somewhere where you know nobody?  How would you react if you were placed in the most awful place imaginable and told to rebuild and settle down?  In Acts 8, Saul started to demolish the church.  People were scattered all over the place.  If I had to pick up and move to the most horrible place I can imagine, and told to rebuild and settle down, I think I would be rather fussy.  However, Acts 8:4 says “Those who had been scattered preached the word wherever they went.”  They had been uprooted and placed elsewhere, yet they spoke the word.   They continued to spread God’s word, and they continued to spread it to anyone who would listen…not just to “church people”.

Could you be exiled into your own brand of Babylon and still proclaim the name of Jesus?  If you knew you had to be there for seventy years, could you realistically be ready to just go out and spread the word of God?  Jeremiah 29: 4 – 7 says this:

4 This is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says to all those I carried  into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: 5 “Build  houses and settle down; plant gardens and eat what they produce. 6 Marry and have sons and daughters; find wives for your sons and give your daughters in marriage, so that they too may have sons and daughters. Increase in number there; do not decrease. 7 Also, seek  the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile.  Pray to the Lord for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper.”

 I don’t know that I could be that scattered and still feel that faithful.  The Lord said, though, that if the city to which you have been exiled prospers, you will also prosper.  If we find ourselves in unfamiliar territory, or maybe all too familiar territory that is so uncomfortable, we need to remember that as we continue to spread God’s word, as we continue to be giving of others, God will also continue to give to us.  No matter our circumstances, we should spread the word of God to all who are willing to listen.  I’m not saying to preach to, or at, them.  I am saying to tell them about the most loving Father and His works…and His word.

We all have those moments when we feel like we have been uprooted from our comfort zone and placed in our own form of hell.  That does not give us the right to look at Jesus and scream or cry, “Why?!”  We can scream and cry all we want.  God’s will be done…on Earth as it is in Heaven.  His will!  His will be done..not ours.  The Lord places us where we can do the most good.  I do believe that.  I did not believe that for a very, very long time.  That place may not feel okay to us, but the Lord knows better than we.  He wants us to talk to others about His work, His word, His love.  He wants us to tell believers and non-believers all the same.   I cursed God and was always asking “Why?!”  I have asked,  “Why, God, did you put me in that place?  Why, God, did you allow me to have to go through that?  Why, God, did I have suffer through this or that?”

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.  Romans 8:28

He is always working for our good.  He has a purpose for each and every single one of us.  He wants us to remain faithful regardless if we feel safe, or if we feel scattered.  Feeling scattered?  Do not curse God about it.  Instead, thank Him for the experiences that are leading you to fulfill your purpose on this Earth, and then spread this love with others.

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Posted by on July 15, 2012 in Uncategorized


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Forgive me, Father

I spend so much time trying to make myself right with God.  Sometimes I get lost in what others are doing.  I get lost in their judgments and mistakes while losing focus of my own.

Forgive me , Father!

I have not always done right by God.  For this, I feel shame.  I am not perfect.  God knows this and loves and accepts me anyway.

Forgive me, Father!

If I fell down to my knees and had my face on the floor for the rest of my life, it would never be enough to get me into Heaven.  I can’t DO anything that will ever be enough.  God finds me enough, anyway. I am grateful for that.

Forgive me, Father!

I tend to sometimes live by “Fleshy” thoughts and behaviors.  I want to live by Godly thoughts and behaviors.

Forgive me, Father!

Hey you!  Yes, you!  Stop being hateful!  Stop being ignorant!  Stop being unloving!  Stop being selfish!  Stop being judgmental!  Father, let me stop these things as well.

Forgive me, Father!

I pray that, today, I can refocus on my own sinful ways and use Godly love and grace toward others.

Forgive me, Father!


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Posted by on July 14, 2012 in Uncategorized


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Would You Notice?

If I never again called you, would you miss the sound of my voice?

If you never saw another Facebook status, comment, or message from me, would you ever wonder where I’d gone?

If you never saw another picture of me, would you forget I ever existed?

If I died tonight, would you notice?


Posted by on July 8, 2012 in Uncategorized



Chris Tomlin sings these words, “My chains are gone.   I’ve been set free.   My God, my Savior, has ransomed me.   And like a flood, His mercy rains.  Unending love, Amazing grace.”

  I have been imprisoned since a child.  My sentence was imposed upon me by those who were supposed to raise and love me the right way.  At this very second, I can honestly say, I forgive them.  Imprisoned for approximately thirty-eight years, I was unable to breathe the fresh air of the guiltless, those unashamed, those untarnished.  I was suffocating and being choked by the dark.  I took steps the other day that I never thought I would have the nerve to take.  One of the seven deadly sins had been killing me off a little every single day.  I was smothered in it like mashed potatoes under a ladle full of hot gravy.  I was wrapped up in it like a newborn baby in a hospital blanket.

I did not want to see what had apprehended me and kept me enslaved for so many years.  I knew it was there, though.  It had been buried so deeply, and it had been flowing through my body so fluidly.  It was “who I was.”  I put those last three words in quotation marks because that which had held me captive was NOT who I was, nor is it who I am.  I threw items away, cut and shred items with my own hands feeling like my body was being ripped opened and the ugly was being released with each tear, with each rip.  I placed the torn and cut materials in two separate bags that had come from a grocery store.  I tied the handles of the bags into knots, and I put them in my car.  I could NOT have that darkness in my house any longer.  It had to go, so I could continue to grow.

I found a dumpster outside of a convenience store, and I put those two bags of darkness in with all the other trash.

God was with me that day.  He released those chains, and I HAVE been set free!  He was just waiting for me to be ready to walk out of the shackles.  I was ready.  Are you ready to step out of your chains, your shackles?  Are you ready to be freed from the heaviness that is not yours to carry any longer?  I would like to help you take that step if you are ready.  We can talk about the fear and every other emotion that goes along with it, and I can pray with and for you, but you have to be the one to take that step outside of confinement.  God is waiting for you to say so.  Say so.  Be freed!

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Posted by on July 3, 2012 in Uncategorized


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