I believe that there is a lesson in every incident that occurs in our lives. Whether those incidents are uplifting, frightening, saddening, maddening, or any other “-ing” word you can mention, there is a lesson to be learned. Today my struggles are saddening and maddening. My flesh tells me one thing. My God tells me another.
My go-to-reaction is to listen and behave as the screaming flesh would have me to do. That has been my M.O. for 43 years. I am 44. As overwhelming as those screeching voices of the flesh are, I am struggling as hard as I can to obey the teachings of God. My struggles, today, are regarding a dream that included an old friendship (and in this dream, this friend behaved as she always had) and a reality based situation that stems from years of abuse, lies, instability, insecurity, and hurt.
God has physically delivered me from my abusive past. The emotional part of that is feeling almost too broken to be mended at this moment. A lifetime of abuse has stained my heart. And while I have opened that heart to allow God to come in, I haven’t willingly kicked those not paying rent out of my heart, or my head. I am proudly exposing my struggles, not because that’s where I want to live, but it’s because I know that where my struggles are, there my God is ready to help me with everything I need.
“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9
I could lash out at those who were supposed to love me, keep me safe, and help me feel secure. I could speak the words that my flesh is familiar with. I will not. I will forgive as God has forgiven me. As I go through this troubled time in the day, I know that forgiveness is my ticket into a lighter, happier, and calmer life. I continually speak “I forgive them.” I may not even mean it now, but I will say it until I do.
Peter asked Jesus how many times he should forgive those who have wronged him.
“Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven.” Matthew 18:22
I will follow where Jesus leads me. He says “seventy times seven.” So, seventy times seven it is. I know that my struggles are hard, tiring, and they weaken me so much. However, I know that I am blessed because in my darkness, Jesus Christ is my light, my strength, and my refuge. I will obey him and love and forgive others as He has loved (always) and forgiven me (over and over and over).
My struggles are blessed because my Father has not forsaken me, nor will He ever.
“For the LORD loves the just and will not forsake his faithful ones. Wrongdoers will be completely destroyed; the offspring of the wicked will perish.” Psalm 37:28
Thank you, Father, for my struggles as they allow me to focus on You. How blessed I am.
What struggles are you facing today? Who God is today, He was yesterday, and He will be tomorrow. He will never forsake you. Blessed are we who know Jesus Christ and struggle because we know that our Light will guide us and keep us.
“He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.” Psalm 91:4
Glory be to God Almighty!