“I must tell Jesus! I must tell Jesus!
I cannot bear my burdens alone;
I must tell Jesus! I must tell Jesus!
Jesus can help me, Jesus alone.”
As I was sitting in my office yesterday, I found some music files from my dearest friend on an older phone that I have. Finding them made my heart so happy! I listened to the two that I had, and my eyes filled with tears because 1.) My dearest friend was singing them, 2.) They spoke about Jesus, and I needed that extra comfort. I have had to make a significant change in my life regarding work. It hit me most recently that I had to leave one of my jobs. I knew that I just had to pray that through. I had to make sure that it wasn’t just my thought. For those who have a relationship with Jesus, I know you understand those times where you are not sure if the thoughts and directions in your heart and head are yours or are from Jesus. I prayed and prayed hard about the decision that has been made. I do know that the steps I am taking are led by Jesus and not by me, my pride, or my own selfishness. That’d be gross. The passion that I had to have my own practice was so good. I prayed to Jesus, told Jesus, about those ambitions and dreams. He directed me to take steps to make that dream come true. Now, I’ve prayed to Jesus, told Jesus, about other ambitions and dreams. He is now directing my steps in a different direction. I do not know what He was in store for me, but I know it’s going to be so very good.
You see, when we let go of our pride, our human nature to do all things on our own, and our selfish ideas and ideals, we can have a great amount of relief and joy. I always want to do what is right by God. I lived my life for so long only listening to myself and others. I cannot even begin to tell you how miserable I was at that point in my life. I would act solely on impulse, out of pure, from-the-flesh needs and wants. Boy, I cannot explain how much trouble that got me into. I was lied to by Satan and believed that I could do whatever I wanted and have no real consequences. And, if I did have consequences, and I did not like them, I could just move on to some other dark situation. I do not have the words to tell you how joyful I am that I do not live in that place anymore! I behaved as I believed others wanted me to. Whatever situation I found myself to be in, I conformed to that situation, healthy or not. I carried so much of the world on my shoulders believing that if I just do whatever everyone else wants me to do, I can make everyone happy. Yeah, I know. That didn’t work so great in my favor.
It wasn’t until I learned that I could absolutely go to Jesus with everything I had and lay my troubles at His feet, that I could feel joy. That my load could be lighter. Not everything that I feel is right for me, is right for me. Oh boy, that’s a whole other blog post! I’m so relieved that I do not have to live my life without the One who gave His life for me. I am SO happy that I can give my burdens to Jesus, and He will take them from me, when I actually let them go completely, and guide me where He would like for me to go. I have great faith that wherever it is I end up in this life, it will be because I trusted God with my whole heart.
“The body of flesh is a heavy burden, the calamities of life are a heavy load…Faith is for this world, and sight is for the other world. It is our duty, and it will be our interest, to walk by faith, till we live by sight. This shows clearly the happiness to be enjoyed by the souls of believers when absent from the body, and where Jesus makes known his glorious presence.” Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary
2 Corinthians 5:1-8
I hope that I can remember this feeling of joy as I move into the next phase of my life. I hope that I can remember that Jesus is always there to take my burdens as I lay them down. I hope that I can always have the faith it takes to actually lay those burdens and down and not pick them up again.