Monthly Archives: July 2015

What My Grown Children Owe Me. 

Nothing.  My grown children owe me nothing. Yep, that’s right.

As a parent, I have always tried my best to do what is right for my children. Now, my best wasn’t always the best.  I failed so many times I cannot even count.  What I did do right was to teach my children to be independent, self-sufficient, responsible human beings.

They are.

Where I have failed when they were smaller, I hope to correct as they continue to grow in their own skins.  I hope to be a spiritual example for them.  I was NOT that when they were growing up.  I did teach them about God, and I do not regret that. However, I didn’t take them to church after being severely hurt by a preacher’s wife.  I allowed that woman to ruin my church experience, and I refused to take my children.  That is just sad for me.  My youngest would always say she wanted to go, and I would refuse to take her because of my hurt.  Selfishness at its finest.  Ugh. I cannot apologize for that enough.

But my kids owe me nothing so that I can feel better about myself.  That’s just gross.  I want them to be spiritually strong.  I want them to be married to strong, Christian men.  Someone who will love them as God loves the church.   They don’t owe that to me, but I hope they feel that they owe that to themselves.  They owe that to God.

What do I owe my children?  I owe them guidance when they ask for it.  Let me repeat that, WHEN THEY ASK FOR IT.  I owe them unconditional love.  To be there for them.  Always.

What do I not owe them?  I do not owe them a rescue every time they get themselves in a bind.  I do not owe them agreement when I disagree.  I do not owe them a blind eye when I see trouble.  If they choose that trouble, I owe them to get out of it by themselves.  I do not owe them an enabling parent.

My grown children do not owe me a phone call.  They do not owe me a hug and/or a kiss. They do not owe me attention.  They do not owe me company.  They love me because they want to not because I think they should.  They owe me nothing.  N-O-T-H-I-N-G.

I love my grown children. I love that they are grown and independent and strong (My momness kinda hates that though).  I also love that they don’t feel like they owe me anything.  At least, I don’t think they believe they owe me.  I would hope that they do not.

I love my children.

That’s all.

1 Comment

Posted by on July 1, 2015 in Uncategorized

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